By Dale Connelly
Dale Connelly and Jim Ed Poole host the Morning Show,
a lighthearted blend of music and humor.
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(To be sung to the tune of
"Gee, Officer Krupke" from West Side Story.)
The voting public's spoken
they've given us the razz
They've got your fire stokin'
And we're the beens what has.
We are the politicians
Who made it our careers.
You're the Guvn'r
who can box our ears!
Gee Jesse the Body, this candidate thing.
It was a big surprise to see your hat in the ring.
It wasn't the ring that you know most about,
Where you can throw opponents out. (Ow, they're out!)
Throw us out, throw us out.
Over up and out.
When you win, you get to throw us out!
Punk: Introducing ... the honorable Governor Whatsisname!
Jesse: All you guys look for work ... you're out!
Punk: Hey Governor ... you hiring?)
We knew that you was runnin'
we knew that you was large.
We heard you was condemning
The bureaucrats in charge.
That's when we started jokin'
We figured you would choke.
Criminetly! Can't ya take a joke?
Gee Jesse the Body, you got that mystique
A combination warrior and populist geek.
You got the charisma, you got the panache,
You turn the language into hash. (Don't be rash)
Don't be rash, don't be rash
Though you're blunt and brash
All we're askin', Jesse don't be rash!
Punk: This here candidate won on account of the voters and the parties are estranged!
Jesse: Hey! I'm stranger than all of them!
Punk: Don't tell us! Tell it to the pundits!)
The experts called you loony,
the politicians too.
Bombastic and buffoony
With no respect for you.
You didn't have a budget.
You didn't have a plan.
Whoopsie Daisy! Now you are The Man.
Yes! Governor Body, we hand it to you.
You starred with Schwarzenegger
And with Linda Blair too.
Professional wrestler, political scold.
Now you have got us in your hold. (In a hold!)
In a hold, in a hold,
in a sleeper hold.
We can't breathe, you got us in a hold!
Punk: I don't see how this unusual fellow can govern effectively!
Jesse: Hey, I'm Governor of Minnesota, not Effectively!
Punk: Take him to the Legislature!)
Your new administration
it won't have no finesse
It's doin' less with less.
You put down politicians.
But don't kick up a fuss!
Votin' Vampires! Now you're one of us!
Hey, Governor Body, we're waitin' to see
What kind of chief executive do you wanna be?
Four years of standoffs, is that what we face?
How 'bout a Presidential race? (What a race!)
It's a race, it's a race!
Very in-your- face!
We could see you in a White House race!
The trouble's regulation
The trouble is the tax
The trouble's overspending.
We gotta face the facts.
The trouble's disaffection.
And you are the effect.
There's no way to vote to dis-elect!
Gee Governor Body, we're dyin' to know,
so just like with Hulk Hogan, is it real or a show?
What is a career poltician to do?
Gee Governor Body ... we love you!