Should parents be held responsible if guests of their kids drink?
Posted at 6:00 AM on September 14, 2009
by Eric Ringham
(24 Comments)
Filed under: Culture, Health
The St. Paul City Council is considering an ordinance that would hold you responsible if underage drinking occurs in your home or rental property, regardless of whether you supply the liquor. Similar ordinances are in effect in other cities, including Chaska. Should parents be held responsible if guests of their kids drink?
Comments (24)
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Well what if the teenagers pregame (drink before the party) and arrive at the party without bringing in alcohol. If the cops come to the house for a noise complaint and find a party and breathalize the kids should the parents be held responsible? If the parents are not even in town or out of the house and the kids decide to throw a party should the parents be held responsible? It's almost impossible to let your kids have parties without a few kids bringing in illegal substances or taking some before a party its just not realistic. Personally this law is insane they have not thought this one through enough... They cant just take away fun from our kids just because they want to have a party. I don't promote underage drinking but from my high school experiences I have learned it is impossible to keep alcohol out of reach from our children. Those of you who disagree with that last few statements obviously didn't go to many parties in high school. When this law affects you then you might think differently because your kids might not be as lame as you were in high school.
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I am under no illusions about the choices underage children will make concerning alcohol. That is why we rely on adults that are present to enforce rules.
If my child is at your house and you knowingly allow my child to consume alcohol, you have comitted a crime.
All of this debate about finer points that would abrogate your responsibility...
Sounds like what a teenager would argue when they are caught.
The purpose of this is to let parents who use the argument, "I'd rather have them drink here where I can monitor the drinking" for their underage children know that they can be arrested. It's also for parents who need help understanding that leaving teenagers home without parental supervision and available alcohol invites underage drinking. Frankly I think we as a society need to do a much better job helping our adolescents learn how to use liquor appropriately than our current expectation, which is that they will magically figure this out on their 21st birthday.
This is insane, if we are out of the house and kids drink then we are responsible?
Do your kids do everything they are supposed to do?
Teenagers try to do the opposite of what they are told, they are testing limits. If you think your kid does everything you say you are wrong.
America is way too uptight about drinking.
In England we had a bar in our high school, unthinkable here. On dance nights, the kids were allowed two drink, they had to pay for them, they had a good time, were not drunk, did not go crazy. The learn about alcohol in a safe setting. Not the crazy reaction kids have once they get to college with out supervision.
I think this is a spurious argument. We already have the tools to hold the property owners responsible for the actions of the irresponsible children or tenants. In St Paul, you can have a house declared a "Nuisance property" where the owner is charged a fee for police calls to their property. We did this with our neighbors, whose children liked to party late and loud. After the declaration was made there were maybe two parties before they learned to be quiet.
The way this was addressed was direct, discreet and effective.
I think the question leaves out a key piece of the ordinance. The ordinance does make you responsible even if you don't supply the liquor, however it also says that if you have no knowledge of it, than you are not held responsible. My question is what is the loop hole now? if a person knows that underage drinking is happening on their property, aren't they an accomplice under current laws? if not, than this ordinance makes sense to me.
Not the way that the proposed ordnance would handle the situation.
If we criminalize this, kids will simply find ways to drink in more dangerous situations with no chance of adult supervision.
I think what adults should be responsible for is not the drinking itself but the behavior of those who drink. If the kids drive drunk, vandalize, engage in loud parties, or drink to the point of death or serious injury, adults present should be held accountable (and not just misdemeanors).
But criminalizing the drinking itself just drives the problem further underground.
As a general rule, yes. True, not every parent, even the best parent, can keep track of what every child does at every second. Even the best kids will make bone-headed mistakes under peer pressure.
But I think it is a good idea to make parents responsible for **actually parenting**. I see way too many parents ignoring their kids running wild and putting themselves in harm's way in public. Am I supposed to imagine that those parents care about what their kids are doing in private? If you can't stop a toddler from throwing rocks at people's heads off a bridge, why should I believe you'll stop your teen from throwing down a few beers?
Too many parents think 'Eh, kids will be kids' or 'I drank at that age and I turned out fine.' Perhaps putting their freedom and dollars on the line will make them change their tune.
Govt = Stay away from my children.
Me as a parent,,, drink in my house and be prepared to get your arse flogged.
My primary response to this question is yes they are. Parents should have conversations and discussions with their children to lay down ground rules stating what is acceptable in their home. This includes alcohol, drugs, and rated media like movies. This ordinance could be a great way for parents to open the dialog with their kids about drinking.
What is the purpose of this? Are we led to believe that we can make people better parents by force? There are in place dozens of laws against under age drinking. These laws have not been effective. In society we have a system of allowing our young ones to grow up little by little. In their early teens they are allowed to watch movies that small children can not. We allow them freedoms that younger children are not given all based on the level of maturity. By the age of sixteen they are allowed to drive a motor vehicle and in some states are allowed to get married, quit school, or attend a University. At the age of 18 they can own property, live on their own, join the military, and smoke. At age 21 they are allowed to consume alcohol. If you have not given your child the tools to make wise decisions why is it some one else's responsibility. This is not Chinese society where the culture recognizes collective responsibility. My father had one rule, if you drink you stay where you are. I added to that for my children, call anytime 24/7 if you are intoxicated and we will come get you without reprecussions. All three of our children are adults age 27 to 30 and have never had an incident. In addition we had very open discussions about drinking and all of the possible problems associated with it. At his moment do you REALLY know where your teenager is?
Absolutely! I have found that most parents are responsible for the kids, but there are some that are lazy and will allow their kids to drink at home and use the "better at home to get drunk then out somewhere else". I know a lot about this since my next door neighbor allows her 2 underage sons to party--many times past 1:00am with their increasingly loud music. I put these parents in the same box with parents who use Xbox and TV to babysit their kids.
It depends. If the parent supplies the alcohol or knowingly provides the location to be used for that purpose then yes. However, why should the parent be prosecuted if they are out of town and their child decides to throw some party?
I hope that the Council thinks this through before putting policies in place that could ruin people's lives.
Most emphatically yes! I think of Secretary Clinton's book, It Takes a Village, about the collective responsibility we have for children. If we don't take responsibility we are possibly allowing an underage drinker to over-consume, die from alcohol poisoning or kill others while driving. There are other issues like increased risk of suicide and date rape associated w/ underage drinking. So, yes!
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