Posted at 1:50 PM on July 21, 2005
by Josh Lee
The latest round of trade rumors has the Twins going after Bill "Shouldn't That Rhyme With Bueller?" Mueller. Depending on who you ask and which magic 8-ball they're shaking at the moment, Minnesota is offering some combination of J.C. Romero, Joe Mays, Kyle Lohse, and T.C. the Bear for the veteran third baseman, and could sort-of-maybe-possibly get Kevin Millar or prospects or a lock of Johnny Damon's hair as throw-ins. And the Marlins may or may not be involved. And the deal's already dead. Except that it isn't.
Yeah, I have no idea either. This is why I try to ignore trades until they actually happen: It's just too hard to figure out the difference between real discussions among GMs, filler copy by harried beat writers, theoretical speculation by message-board junkies, and desperate wishing upon stars by fans who would like to someday see their team win a game without needing a heroic ninth-inning rally to do it.
Actually, I think it's safe to assume that this isn't just desperate wishing on stars, because seriously — if I were to wish for a new third baseman? I'd wish for one with a slugging percentage above .400. I'm just saying.