This summer is shaping up to be one of the worst for travel. Canceled flights more than doubled in June, and frequent business travelers like Rich Moran, who know airports like the back of their hand, are feeling the stress perhaps more than most.
"Business travel has become something akin to going to the dentist these days," Moran tells Linda Wertheimer.
Based on his experiences with the sometimes unfriendly skies, Moran, a partner with the venture capital firm Venrock, has drawn up this suggested business traveler's bill of rights:
• Reclining seats should be illegal. At least, there should be a sensor so that if you have your laptop on the tray the sensor will not allow the seat in front of you to recline.
• Any business trip that involves the words tram, train, people mover or shuttle should receive extra credit in the frequent flyer department.
• Bags of nuts, the free ones that are distributed, should contain no garlic. Every little bit helps when you arrive home later than promised.
• All lavatories should have timers. After a certain amount of time the offending occupant should get sprayed with blue water.
• Snoring alarms should be installed near the flight attendant call button. When snoring occurs the oxygen masks will drop. Put it over the muzzle of the snorer.
• Discount coupons should be provided if the person next to you requires a seat belt extender. A double discount if the people on both sides of you require extenders.
• A "Working Section" should be provided on every airplane. Like the old smoking sections, this should be a place where laptops plug in and there is a printer somewhere by the lavatories.
• Any time a flight is late the airline should call your boss to tell them how you have suffered.
• No hanging around at counters allowed. Especially over by the side where the jerk thinks if he schmoozes the gate agent he will get the upgrade, and not you.
• Any traveler with over a million miles should be guaranteed a space for any carry-on bag.
• If the flight attendant knows your name because you fly so much, you should fly for free.
• After 2 million miles, the airlines should provide all drinks for free. If you are already in business or first class, they should give you little bottles to take home with you.
Rich Moran's most recent business book is called Nuts, Bolts, and Jolts.