A Fine Name By Any Measure
Posted at 6:00 AM on March 12, 2010
by Dale Connelly
(53 Comments)
Radio Heartland has tickets to give away to see Joe Henry this Sunday, March 14th, at The Dakota in Minneapolis. Show time is 7pm.
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We wrap up "names" week on Trial Balloon with this recent news item:
A group of scientists has proposed naming a new measure of energy savings after a colleague of theirs, Dr. Arthur Rosenfeld, who has been a champion of energy conservation in California. It's a long-standing tradition in scientific research to bestow a person's name on a unit of measurement when that person has done significant work to advance the field. That's how we got watts in electricity and curies for radiation. How many teslas are created by a refrigerator magnet? I don't know, but it took only one to name it - Nikola Tesla, an electromagnetic pioneer and a scientific trailblazer.
Dr. Rosenfeld seems flattered by the attention though he is not necessarily promoting the idea of permanently attaching his name to each and every savings of 3 billion kilowatt-hours per year (the equivalent of a 500 megawatt coal-fired power plant). He told the San Jose Mercury-News "Whether it's called the Rosenfeld or not doesn't matter to me. I would never call it that myself -- that's immodest."
But someday soon, states may compete with one another to see who can save the most Rosenfelds. That would be a positive development for everyone, and if your name happens to be Rosenfeld, it does create a comforting illusion that millions of people have got your back.
Dr. Rosenfeld has been so prolific in his work on energy conservation, there's also a "Rosenfeld Effect" and "Rosenfeld's Law". But what if it didn't take any kind of actual scientific achievement to get your name attached to a new unit of measure? What if, like politics, all it took to succeed was a very, very intense interest in getting people to know and use your name? Then the only thing left to settle is this question - which unit of measure suits you best?
I've spent just about my entire adult life doing morning radio, which has put me in a prolonged sleep deprivation cycle, - getting about 5 ½ hours most nights. So I'd like to propose that one "Dale" be decreed the basic unit of inadequate sleep. It doesn't hurt that "dale" already means "a valley" or "a low spot," and this would get my name spread around quite a bit because lack of sleep is a huge problem in the USA. It would also create a situation where I might turn on the TV one night to see a distinguished looking doctor in a sleeping pill ad telling a lovely young actress, "Marcy, if you only had one dale last night - that's not enough! Most healthy young women need to get at least 1.4 dales every time they go to bed."
Of course it's not just women. Everybody would need more dales.
If you could arrange to have your name (first or last) immortalized as a unit of measure, an Effect or a Law, what would it be?
Comments (53)
I'm not sure it would be a good idea to have a unit of measure named a "sherrilee" as no one would ever spell it correctly!
Sherrilee,
Good point. Whenever I start to spell your name, I pause for a moment to wonder if there are two r's, two l', or two e's. Or all of the above. Maybe there should be a "Sherrilee Effect", which could be described as "temporary mental paralysis brought on by spelling confusion."
I bet it's a pretty common "effect".
Although if we did have a "sherrilee" it would have to be the amount of time between the first time you call your teenager in the morning and the time they actually come downstairs for breakfast.
Ha ha ha! Perfect Dale.
The best example I know of name units is the FU or "Friedman Unit." Saint Louis Park's most famous guru is Tom Friedman, the columnist. Friedman used to be enthusiastic about the Iraq war. As that war slogged on in blood and misery, Friedman kept finding reasons to hope some new policy wrinkle was going to turn the war into a success starting about six months away. When he got to that point in time six months later Friedman would predict that the next six months would be absolutely critical in the war.
Liberal blogger Duncan Black ("Atrios") coined the phrase "Friedman Unit" to mock that rubbery ruler for measuring success. Friedman predicted that the next six months would be decisive on at least 14 different occasions.
Will Americans ever catch up on badly needed sleep? Maybe. The next two or three FUs should tell the tale.
Have a wonderful weekend, heartlanders!
Good Morning Potential Measurement Units,
Well, Dale, I also have been getting less sleep that I would like to get lately, usually not much more than one Dale. Having raised children I am well aware of the unit Sherrilee mentioned.
I will try to think of a unit that could use my name as it's name, but with only about one Dale of sleep, I am not too quick witted this morning.
I work in clinical genetics where the long-standing tradition was that if you discovered and described a syndrome you could name it after yourself. I remember being disappointed early in graduate school when I learned that some obscure dermatologist had the same last name as I and had already applied it to a syndrome.
Most genetic syndromes are sad and represent deformity, disease, or at least discomfort.I am resolved to find a syndrome that makes a baby cuter, happier, or at least not any worse off. I'd be happy to call the condition Beth-Ann Syndrome.
I work in clinical genetics where the long-standing tradition was that if you discovered and described a syndrome you could name it after yourself. I remember being disappointed early in graduate school when I learned that some obscure dermatologist had the same last name as I and had already applied it to a syndrome.
Most genetic syndromes are sad and represent deformity, disease, or at least discomfort.I am resolved to find a syndrome that makes a baby cuter, happier, or at least not any worse off. I'd be happy to call the condition Beth-Ann Syndrome.
its really easy to think of units for the other people in your life. my wife would have deb units where she walked around the house with a cleaning rag in her hand wiping down the counters and walls, my kid would have an emma moment looking slack jawed at the tv with sponge bob or some other idiot show on the boob tube. a sppence would occur when i got that teenage sideways look that tells me i am being a stupid dad. when done using the rest room i would be sure i wiped my lynne (ex wife) and of suppose i would create a tim when i came up with a wise crack that amused me for a moment.
Good morning fellow Heartlanders-
If a unit were named after me, it would have to be the unit of time between putting something on my TO DO list and actually accomplishing it.
Including my last name's initial, my unit of measure could be known as the DB. It is the unit of space that fills your head when you can't think of the word you want during a conversation or blog post. It's also when you can't remember a person's name, the title of a song or book, or where you laid down your glasses.
Great fun and hilarity with the Dale, the Sherylllee, and all the others sure to come. Thanks for making Friday start out this way!
I think a double post on this blog could be called a Jim. I've made a fairly large number of double posts in the past. Now I see that Beth-Ann has one Jim this morning. Well, you've got a long way to go to pass my record for Jim's, Beth-Ann.
Julie, I have a hot tip for you. Put something on your To-Do list right after you have done it. Give your To-Do lists a retro look and see how much better you feel about them.
i love it steve. thats my kind of list. can we call it a steve?
how many db's might be allowed before someone hauls me off to the doctor for dementia testing? And who's counting? And a julie...best solution is to lose the list (reminding me of that line from Greg Brown...spring wind blowing the list away, is it?)
Perhaps a cynthia is the time it takes for me to say "I've got to go", the number of things I find to do or say before I actually go...
I think there is already a "Teri" syndrome, only it is spelled "tarry". Dictionary says: 1. To delay or be late in going, coming, or doing.
Hmm. I think I better get ready for work, I am "Teri-ing" again this morning. Have a great weekend, Heartlanders!
Happy Friday, all!
The elinor effect can be observed in persons who exhibit more can do attitude than their current availability, energy, and resources warrant, resulting in the insurmountable accumulation of tasks both at work and at home.
I would measure the humor content of practical jokes in Jakes, after my 89 year old father who is a great practical joker and afficionado of the silly and absurd.
Oh, I'm a big fan of the "steve". I often make long lists for the weekend or during periods when I have lots of things that need doing, highlighting them as I go. And if I do something that wasn't on the list, I write it on and then highlight it! Glad to know this syndrome now has a name!
I think I have could have used several of the measurements mentioned - Elinors, DBs, Dales...my dad was guilty not so much of Jakes, but of Bills (incredibly bad puns).
Today I have a surfeit of Annas (periods/minutes of running late.
Pardon the OT, but that version of "Gril from the North Country" is fantastic. Thanks Dale!
Tom Waits always brings me out of the woodwork, my spring break from teaching begins today wihich also brings me crawling out of the woodwork. Enjoying the conversation
Today is sunny and beautiful-our first day without fog in over 50 days. I don't know what the unit of measure is for water content of snow, but we should have lots of melting today. When we lived in Canada I always liked to hear the wind chill index, which was reported by Environment Canada in units that sounded like Kilopascals, and then sometimes qualified by the statement "exposed skin will freeze within 20 seconds."
welcome michelle. enjoy spring break
Pardon the OT, but that version of "Gril from the North Country" is fantastic. Thanks Dale!
Oh, now, that double post wasn't fair! I just hit the recycle button to see more posts. I had an empty post box! Dang! This software is buggy. Sorry.
I Love the silly music Friday Dale.
Thanks for With Her Head Tucked Underneath Her Arm. I was going to request that one......
I would use a Lu to measure the number of novels read in lieu of completing anything on the To Do list.
There already is a LU Decomposition which has to do with square matrices (matrixes?) in linear algebra, according to Wikipedia. I don't understand it at all.
When I use my full name, Lucille, the only thing that comes to mind is the unit of time between the start of an everyday activity and the moment it becomes a comedy schtick (chocolate factory, Vegematic, etc.)
well, after a couple of DBs, i came up with this, in honor of my dad:
the unit is Teds, and it means the average amount of time between the making of a sly joke with a straight face and realization by the jokee that it IS a joke....my family is famous for this type of joking, and it is a matter of competition to get a high rate of Teds by making the joking, often ironic remark (which is usually the opposite of one's real view or feelings) sound as real as possible. we rejoice in the gullibility revealed :-)
usage example: "Ha! I told Donna to 'bite me' on the blog, and it took three Teds for her to realize i was kidding."
what a great blog topic, dale; you've outdone yourself on this one for creativity!!
I think the elinor effect where a person tries to do too much is partly responsible for my sleep being about one Dale. I always tell myself that I can bring the elinor effect under control with better planning, and this does help.
Maybe we need the "give me a break' unit where you take some time for yourself and don't worry about things. Do we have any one who can take credit for that unit?
steve is pulling a jim this moring i see
Morning everyone...
I got nothin'....
...hey wait--
Kay's post reminded me that beck in the 60's my family began using the Elsie (named for my mother) to describe an impossible offer. Actual examples:
Mom: Would you like some more macadamia nut ice cream, Doug?
Doug: Yes, please.
Mom: There isn't any more.
Mom: How do you like this casserole? It's a new recipe.
All of us at the table: It's really good (and similar positive responses.)
Mom: I'm not going to make it any more.
jim, i think the "Lu" qualifies for the "taking time for yourself" unit...although i suspect peopkle like myself rarely use only one Lu...more like 4 Lu's to the one unit of working on shores...:-)
oops, "people" and "chores"--otherwise preceding post really makes no sense--:-(
(Lu, the Elsie is hysterical!)
Lu -- funny you mention Lucille Ball, because when I'm asked to spell my name, I always think of her saying on the show once that her name was spelled with three "L's. Of course everyone looked at her like she was crazy and she explained "One in the beginning and two towards the end". Sherrilee has three "E"s... one toward the beginning and two at the end!
Great blog today Heartlanders... very funny and entertaining! I think the Jasper Effect should be when you are sitting in front of the computer with a smile playing about your mouth during the DC show!
Have a GREAT weekend
And I think Clyde is Teri-ing; haven't heard from him on this subject yet. Not sure how to measure that, though.
Hilarious morning! Since grandmas have come into the mix, I think a Helga would be the amount of time it takes to realize you've just been given a back-handed compliment. For instance, "Bette, those new glasses make your face look so much better!"
And maybe a Babs Syndrome would be the habit of starting a new project (or career) with gusto, and then eventually letting it go when an interesting new one comes along.
Hm...if I had a scale or unit of measurement named after me, I wonder if people would finally be able to pronounce my name...? Probably not. It would just be more generally known and mispronounced.
If there were to be a scale or unit of measruement for me, it would have to be for either sarcasm or cynicism. One of the two.
Keep this in mind though, if a scale or unit of measurement is based upon you, then you become the baseline. Which means that this vast accomplishment of yours that you're know for is potentially marginalilzed by others being measured against you.
Lu, in my family we say some one is pulling an "Adeline" when they do something really cheap or frugal, especially when they announce it, the more boastfully the better. Adeline was my mother. "Coffee is too expensive right now, so I am reusing the grounds three or four times." Or saying she would take us out to eat at, oh, say, McDonalds and then looking at the costs and saying she didn't think she could afford it, “so let's go home and I will cook. I'm sure there's something there I can make.” This last one we were never sure was a ploy to get us to pay, which it did, or if she was being genuine. She built up about 1/3 of a million doing this. We knew she was getting senile when she showed some generosity. The name has filtered into my daughter's in-law family. Her brothers- and sister-in-law refer to their parents as doing Adelines now, who despite their million plus dollars, won't pay for anything for their kids or grandkids, I mean like presents and the simple things parents do out of love.
There are many ways to pull a “Cleo,” my sister. 1) Move too quickly. (As a child she would wind her legs around the chair legs and then leave the chair before unwinding her legs). 2) Manage everything. For instance on today’s posts, a “Cleo” would be to write a long to-do list and then get it done. 3) Other “Cleos” are similar things—doing things with speed and efficiency. Now, don’t you all just hate her?
Hereis why I have been slow to blog:
A “Clyde” used to be to leave without anyone noticing. This actually got applied when I was in HS and then later in college, 400 miles away, without my telling them about it.
But I have a new use for Clyde. I am going to measure my pain in Clydes. There is a 1 to 10 scale for pain in fm. I am feeling about 8 or 9 Clydes this morning. 8 is when it takes about an hour to type this much. 9 is when bike riding cannot be done.
We have Jonahs in our family, a bit harder to define. Example: friend of ours asked our grandson two days ago what he wants to be when he grows up. He said, “I’m only four years old; it will be years before I even begin to worry about an answer to the question.”
TGithH—a good measure for you. Funny thought. So from a past blog, we want to know what kind of vehicle you drive.
Good weekend all. I hope to get down to about 5 or 6 Clydes, my normal range, by this evening so I can have fun with grandkids. We are babysitting this weekend.
Clyde, I'm sorry to hear you are in so much pain. Is it the dreary weather that sends it so high on the scale?
Families are such a rich lode of potential units of measurement. We have a unit of time named for my husband's cousin (names have been changed to protect family harmony), applied to family celebrations which actually get going 2 hours or more after the announced time. When my son had to work on Thanksgiving, he knew he would still make it in time for dinner at his cousin's house because it would be on "Fisher time." If you actually arrive at the time on the invitation, you could find yourself putting up decorations, or setting the table, or chopping vegetables, or frying rosettes.
Lu, weather is not one of my triggers. I do not know of any trigger for when my pain gets this high. I know lots of triggers for lower level pains. It may be that the triggers have a delayed effect. For instance, I visited my sister-in-law in the hospital two days ago. Among my biggest triggers are chemicals and cleaning agents. Left a church over unidentifed smells as triggers. So maybe this high spike is a delayed effect of that. If I ever have to go ino the hospital, they will have to put me in the hospital because I am in the hospital.
We used to have Hermans in my family, for my uncle who did everything early. If you wanted Herman for supper, you invited him for dinner, as it was called then. With Herman the point of recreation was to get the task event done, not to enjoy it. Germans!!
Someone said they miss the funny songs from the morning show. I love Radio Heartland but I do miss show tunes. Wouldn't a Broadway tunes show be fun?
Great songs this morning. I could use some of this silliness on Monday mornings, as well!
In our family, pulling a "Wendy" means traveling "heavy" even for a weekend get-away. Two suitcases, a toiletries case, and a garment bag. Really?!? An "Audrey", on the other hand, would have to mean buying a birthday or Christmas gift for someone, and then losing it somewhere in the house, after placing it in a spot I was sure not to forget (or so I thought). Oy.
"barbs" happens during the night when you are in bed. one barb is 10 minutes of time spent thinking that you don't really need to get up to go to the bathroom. some nights i spend 3 or 4 barbs before i finally give up and get out of those warm quilts. that cuts down on the Dales then, because one gets no sleep during these barbs.
happy weekend, RHers!
Last three posts are funny because my wife is all three of the units named. Packing for us to be gone for two nights (her for three nights) at our daughters house to babysit took two big suitcases and five hangers each with at least two things on it. While packing, she found three rpesents for Christmas she forgot she had. And she does your bedtime trick, barb.
yes, laurie, show tunes, musicals, and more silly songs wrapped into the usual show!!
Just realized we all lose a dale tomorrow night.
Everyone, hey, do something wise and something stupid this weekend. Do something kind in secret. Accept what good others want to give you and pass it on to others. Have a sabbath weekend.
These are all so terrific!
Clyde - even in pain you entertain us well.
So Kay, your usage example about me not knowing you were kidding about the 'bite me' remark is really said in jest, correct? Because YOU know very well that I KNOW that YOU KNOW that YOU KNEW that I KNEW you were full of it from the start!
OK, to summarize, we've got:
- one "Dale" be decreed the basic unit of inadequate sleep
- "Sherrilee Effect", which could be described as "temporary mental paralysis brought on by spelling confusion."
- OR: "sherrilee" would have to be the amount of time between the first time you call your teenager in the morning and the time they actually come downstairs for breakfast.
- Steve: "Friedman Unit" to mock that rubbery ruler for measuring success. Friedman predicted that the next six months would be decisive on at least 14 different occasions.
- a syndrome that makes a baby cuter, happier, or at least not any worse off. I'd be happy to call the condition Beth-Ann Syndrome.
- tim: my wife would have deb units where she walked around the house with a cleaning rag in her hand wiping down the counters and walls, my kid would have an emma moment looking slack jawed at the tv with sponge bob or some other idiot show on the boob tube. a sppence would occur when i got that teenage sideways look that tells me i am being a stupid dad. when done using the rest room i would be sure i wiped my lynne (ex wife) and of suppose i would create a tim when i came up with a wise crack that amused me for a moment.
- a Julie: the unit of time between putting something on my TO DO list and actually accomplishing it.
- Donna - the DB… is the unit of space that fills your head when you can't think of the word you want during a conversation or blog post. It's also when you can't remember a person's name, the title of a song or book, or where you laid down your glasses.
- a double post on this blog could be called a Jim.
- a steve: Put something on your To-Do list right after you have done it. Give your To-Do lists a retro look and see how much better you feel about them.
- Perhaps a cynthia is the time it takes for me to say "I've got to go", the number of things I find to do or say before I actually go...
- I think there is already a "Teri" syndrome, only it is spelled "tarry". Dictionary says: 1. To delay or be late in going, coming, or doing.
- The elinor effect can be observed in persons who exhibit more can do attitude than their current availability, energy, and resources warrant, resulting in the insurmountable accumulation of tasks both at work and at home.
- Renee: I would measure the humor content of practical jokes in Jakes, after my 89 year old father who is a great practical joker and afficionado of the silly and absurd.
- Anna: periods/minutes of running late.
- Lu in Plymouth: I would use a Lu to measure the number of novels read in lieu of completing anything on the To Do list; and:
- Lucille, the only thing that comes to mind is the unit of time between the start of an everyday activity and the moment it becomes a comedy schtick (chocolate factory, Vegematic, etc.)
- Kay: Teds… means the average amount of time between the making of a sly joke with a straight face and realization by the jokee that it IS a joke....
- Lu in Plymouth: the Elsie (named for my mother) to describe an impossible offer.
- Barbara in Robbinsdale: a Helga would be the amount of time it takes to realize you've just been given a back-handed compliment.
- Barbara: a Babs Syndrome would be the habit of starting a new project (or career) with gusto, and then eventually letting it go when an interesting new one comes along.
- Clyde: an "Adeline" when they do something really cheap or frugal, especially when they announce it, the more boastfully the better.
- Clyde: to pull a “Cleo,” my sister. 1) Move too quickly. (As a child she would wind her legs around the chair legs and then leave the chair before unwinding her legs). 2) Manage everything. For instance on today’s posts, a “Cleo” would be to write a long to-do list and then get it done. 3) Other “Cleos” are similar things—doing things with speed and efficiency.
- A “Clyde” … to leave without anyone noticing.
- Audrey: pulling a "Wendy" means traveling "heavy" even for a weekend get-away… An "Audrey", on the other hand, would have to mean buying a birthday or Christmas gift for someone, and then losing it somewhere in the house, after placing it in a spot I was sure not to forget.
- Barb in Blackhoof: "barbs" happens during the night when you are in bed. one barb is 10 minutes of time spent thinking that you don't really need to get up to go to the bathroom.
See, we should write a book.
Barbara--what a summarization--much funnier to read through it as one summary.
Book title--1) Usometrics, 2) Mystic Measurements, 3) Our Measuring Cup Runneth Over, 4) Cupcake Charts (Say, did you know today is PI Day--a good day for this topic), 5) 3.141.6 Dales, Sherrilees, Adelines, and TGitH's.
excellent summary barbara. can we make a barbara into a well done summary of a topic?
clyde pi day is 3.14 on sunday. i have two kids with that birthday 4 years apart. one of them used to go to st louis park high school and pi day is a big fund raiser for them. thye serve pie and charge some reasonable price for al the pie and ice cream you care to eat. what a great idea. good directive for the wekend goals i will try
keep on the guy in the hat. we need to find out what kind of car her drives. i'm betting on the beige mini van
jim--how dumb of me not to get the day 3.14. But I read an article about schools doing pi day Friday.
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