That Pivotal Moment
Posted at 1:01 PM on September 8, 2009
by Dale Connelly
(25 Comments)
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The word on the media "street" is that health care reform rides on president Obama's speech tonight. All of the posturing and discussion, the many conferences and the thoughtful symposia, the hundreds of good ideas and thousands of bad ones offered through years and years of passionate debate - all of it leads to this single speech and the reaction to it.
That's a little bit of pressure.
Public speaking is difficult to begin with - some are paralyzed with fear at the thought of saying anything at all in front of a group. The president doesn't seem to have that problem, but he does have a big job to do this evening.
That's why I think he should open with a joke.
Opening jokes are a standard feature of just about any kind of speech except this kind. It's so serious, nobody expects to hear a joke and that moment of surprise would help break the tension.
Of course it has to be just the right joke or everything could be totally ruined forever.
I wish I could say I'm good at writing jokes, but I'm not. Most people aren't. But that's why we have the internet. It's full of jokes, and I found one that ought to be OK. Here it is:
A genie gave three physicians one wish each. The first physician said, "I'm already the smartest pediatrician in the world, but I'd like to be 25% smarter."
Poof! The pediatrician became 25% smarter.The second physician said, "I'm already the smartest neurologist in the world, but I'd like to be 50% smarter."
Poof! The genie made the neurologist 50% smarter.The third physician told the genie, "I'm not only the smartest surgeon in the world, but I'm also the smartest person. But, just to be sure, I'd like you to make me 100% smarter."
"This is the third and final wish," the genie said. "If I fulfill your wish, I can't change you back."
"Just make me 100% smarter," the surgeon demanded."Okay," said the genie. Poof! "You're a nurse practitioner!!"
That's funny because it puts down doctors and builds up nurse practitioners. Everybody but doctors thinks it's OK to make fun of doctors. And people who have anything at all to do with nurse practitioners are often trying to find new ways to praise them, so this joke helps out in that department too.
But members of Congress are the ones who the president must sway, and this one joke may not do the whole job because there's still a lot of concern about what this plan is going to cost. So I suggest President Obama lengthen the punch line to say this:
"Poof! You're a nurse practitioner! And your salary just went down 80%!"
It's always dangerous to lengthen a punch line, but in this case I think President Obama has to do it because it sends three important messages:
1) I'm all for saving money.
2) I love those nurse practitioners.
3) This wasn't really a joke at all - it's part of my plan.
If you had to give a pivotal speech to a smarty pants group where everyone had pretty much already made up their mind and everything you had done in your life up to that point seemed to depend on how it went over, how would you break the ice?
Comments (25)
...you mean, like being the first to post to the day's TB blog? I can't even imagine having the guts to do it.
me neither, Gail!
I'd say, "Hello my fellow countrymen. How the hell are ya?"
Good laugh this morning, DC!
Donna, I'd set my VCR to record THAT to save for posterity!
Or rather, "Good evening my fellow countrymen. How the hell are ya?" ....and then, "What's your favorite beer?"
Barb, your post is all about irony, isn't it? You smarty pants!
I'm in agreement with Gail and Barb, I would have a very hard time making speechs of that kind. However, I might suprise myself, and find some way to do it. I didn't think that I could tell jokes, but I gave it a try when had a job that included holding meetings on sustainable agriculture. I was actually was able to tell jokes and even got some laughs.
And Gail - you used irony in your first post, also, correct?
What a bunch of pundits on this blog we have!
(I cannot shut up this morning.)
Thanks for playing my favorite tap-dance song Dale!
How about a duet with Joe Biden of I love to laugh from Mary Poppins?
Incluses the joke I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith.......Waht's the name of his other leg????
Even Harry Reid abd Orrin Hatch would snile and pass universal health care by acclamation!
Greetings! Oh yeah, I turned on the computer just in time to hear Michael Doucet -- it's a good day! Thanks, Dale!
Any speech needs to start out with a good joke -- some way to make everyone feel at ease ... and funky ... Obama is a master. Clinton was also great at that. Maybe Obama could play saxophone or guitar to start out.
Okay, I was trying to make a "thoughtful" answer to Dale's posting, but I guess I missed the "irony" in Gail and Barb's comments. Well, what can I say? The irony of this situation leaves me speachless.
Singalongs often make people feel at ease. Borrowing from Beth-Ann's Mary Poppins reference, maybe everyone could sing "Just a Spoonful of Sugar Helps the Medicine Go Down." It's topical, easy to sing, and it's hard to be grumpy about Mary Poppins.
this whole health care debate has turned into a "sick" joke; worrying and scary
so good jokes would be welcome; more on the order of bob and ray ( we have enuf of the the 3 stooges out there already)
by the by, the first day of first grade was great, we just had pancakes and will head toward the bus soon for day 2
What if Obama made everyone in the audience turn to the left and give their neighbor a shoulder massage? Loosen up those tight, cranky people, and a demonstration of preventative care. We used to do this a lot in choir practice and it makes everyone feel better. Enjoying the Chieftains. Have a great morning!
good morning, all! the week is almost half over. ;-)
elinor
Ah, once again this group is SO creative. How about a health care fable acted out with hand puppets? There are some really cute ones out there...
Or a few well written/chosen limericks?
thanx for the lovely randy newman song
we have a great, homey situation , both houses are on the same property, right across the yard, so i see the twins almost every day, but not all day any more except for school holidays
it was quiet here yesterday
Hi All,
Say Dale, as long as the world may end @ 9:09:09, maybe you could stick around live for a few more songs?
Some suggestions:
The end of the line - Traveling Wilburys
The 20th Century is almost over - Johnny Cash (also done with the Highwaymen group)
A shout out to Jim last night, we spoke by telephone.
Karen, I really like your idea, but that didn't bode well for "W" Bush, when he did the same for Angela Merkel. Scheisse gemachen!
if it were me, i'd start out with something dramatic---save the jokes for a little later....gotta acknowledge the seriousness of the situation...
i have a new personal take on the situation in that despite being pretty healthy overall, i have been turned down by three health insurance companies here in Utah---as "uninsurable"---with risk factors noted such as my adult acne medication--and a single episode (completely resolved) of back pain several years ago?!?!???!
so anyway, i'd begin with some comparative data re the wealth of the people making the decision and the relative poverty of the rest of us who need health care!!!!
Mike,I guess I see what you are refering to with all the nines coming up on the 9th day of the 9th month of 2009. I don't know why Dale isn't worried about this. We did, in deed, finally get a chance to talk last night. I hope all those efforts of the Blue Zone people in albert Lea to extend people's lives will not be in vain if the world ends.
Oh I'm definitely planning on being around a while longer. Just got some prescriptions refilled yesterday, and more importantly, bought a car wash when I filled up the car yesterday. I didn't use it because I'm waiting for the impending rain to pass. But then I realized, I should have gotten the car washed yesterday as it would have guaranteed rain today.
So long, it's been good to know ya ;-)
Perhaps the President could open by singing a couple of verses from "We Can Work It Out".
I'd just like to point out that 9:09:09 on 09/09/09 just came and went and we're all still standing! The world goes on...
Jasper continues...
all is well.
9:09 9/9/09
ACK!
"Jasper continues...
all is well."
Ah, but do we know that? Isn't that one of the things about computers in control? People could be wiped out, but Jasper would continue broadcasting to the vast empty spaces......
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