Moving up. Moving out.

Posted at 8:18 AM on June 27, 2006 by Bob Collins (3 Comments)

Today my son, who just graduated from high school, is packing up his room and moving out. He and his older brother, and another friend, are the proud new renters of an apartment in Maplewood. It's closer to where he'll be going to school and as a newly minted EMT, probably closer to where he'll work, wherever that is.

His brother moved out when he was 18 too. I thought he'd come back, after finding out how tough it is on your own. He didn't. He flourished, as most kids do. Figures, I went off to college at 18, and was the one member of my family of 2 brothers and 2 sisters who didn't move back home to live.

I hate to sound corny, but I didn't think this would all go that fast. It was only yesterday, for example, when I missed his 4th birthday because I was driving from Massachusetts to Minnesota to begin a job at Minnesota Public Radio, leaving my family behind for a month to finish jobs and school.

I still feel bad about that. It's been a terrific 18 years with the kid. And it gets me thinking of an area of politics that nobody ever dares talk about. The effect of the job on families.

I really don't know if there's enough money in the world to make me miss a day of my kids' growing up. But if you're a parent and you run for Congress or Senate, you're giving up a lot of days.

The Blog for Bell site has a feature -- I mentioned it a few posts ago -- where they take 5 questions a week from somebody and Ford Bell answers it. So far -- and I just read KvM's questions on Gary Miller's Web site (I'd give a link but stuff lately has been appearing on my RSS feed of KvM but it's not posted at the site) -- they've all been the usual political issue and political strategy questions. Nothing wrong with that. But I get bored with that stuff after a short time.

But more and more I find I can learn a lot more about people by asking them questions about real life. Their real life.

They're not big hairy deals, just opportunities for little glimpses. And although I realize they sound judgmental, they're not intended to be.

-1- What is it that made you decide that the job in Washington was worth time away from your children?

-2- Do you mow your own lawn? How often? What do you think about when you're mowing?

-3- What's the last e-mail you sent someone you wish you hadn't?

-4- What's the one thing you'd tell your father today that he was right about, which at the time he told you, you said he was wrong about?

-5- What would you give up to spend one more day with your kids?

I don't really expect any politicians to answer these questions. But the more I hear the rote answers to the same old issues, and the more I think about the gap between some of those issues and what people face on a day-to-day basis, I'm not completely sure it's not time to start talking about what's in their heart, as well as what's on their mind.

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Comments (3)

I like your challenge to get to know the candidates better as real people. Since I'm not a typical politician, I thought I'd be the first to send you my answers to your questions - frank and honest.

-1- What is it that made you decide that the job in Washington was worth time away from your children? I get asked that alot. Why now? Why with a young child? Sometimes life doesn't present opportunities on your own timetable - like a once in 30 years open seat. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith.

I'm running for Congress because of Lissa. I believe I can make a big difference in Washington, as an Independent voice, and make the world better for her as well. Lissa will be traveling with me to Washington and we will come back home here Friday through Mondays. Votes in the U.S. House are much more structured and predictable than in the Senate. I believe you can be a good Mom and good Congresswoman - without sacrificing one for the other.

But if it gets to be too much of a strain, I can leave after my first term and let someone else have a turn. I'm not in this for a lifetime job, I'm in it to make a difference.

-2- Do you mow your own lawn? How often? What do you think about when you're mowing? I have only mowed my lawn three times this summer. The other three times I've had a friend do it. With the time commitment needed for the campaign, I've become okay with the "return to nature" look so the lawn only gets mowed every 2-3 weeks. My lawn is definitely not going to be pictured on Midwest Home and Gardens. When I am mowing, I like to tune out and listen to my iPod.

-3- What's the last e-mail you sent someone you wish you hadn't? Just last week.

-4- What's the one thing you'd tell your father today that he was right about, which at the time he told you, you said he was wrong about? "Just wait until you have kids of your own!"

-5- What would you give up to spend one more day with your kids? That's a tough question - especially when you're in the middle of a full-throttle campaign for Congress. But since I started this campaign, I've given up golf (I was lousy anyway), TV (except for Gray's Anatomy and Rescue Me)and cleaning my house.

Tonight, Lissa and I are going for a long stroller ride. She is my greatest joy and greatest priority. Whatever the outcome of this race, my proudest achievement will always be motherhood. Good parenting is the best legacy we can leave. If I can't succeed at both my house and the U.S. House, I won't run for re-election.

Posted by Tammy Lee | June 27, 2006 3:17 PM

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1. Well, I'm just going to St. Paul, and while my wife and I working on it, we don't have a little one yet. I see government as the best tool we have yet created by which to ensure a world we can be proud to give our children.
2. Typically, my wife mows our lawn - she finds going up our hill in front a bit like the stairclimber machine. I've been known to do the trimming, though. Recently, I've been thinking about pettition signers most of the time.
3. The last email I had with Richard Winger (Ballot Access News) was a downer. We had been discussing whether letting the parties nominate candidates violates the Repubican form of Government clause, and he basically said that Independents in Minnesota shouldn't complain because we have it so good compared to other states. I brought the nazis into the discussion at that point - something about Jewish people in some camps having worse conditions than others. He didn't reply. I have a tendency to have heated conversations.
4. Not a thing he said, but the way he is. He was a wedding photographer, and he had a very silly and outgoing persona that I found embarassing - he got a lot of attention making fart noises, sometimes. Truth is, you have to be willing to make people hear you however you can.
5. Like I said, I working on it, but I can't imagine anything I'd rather do than be with the kid. I might give up health insurance and take a part time job.

Posted by Justin | June 29, 2006 6:51 AM

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Tammy, are you in the US 5 race?

I'm in MN 58a

Posted by Justin | June 29, 2006 6:51 AM

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