A parental dilemma

Posted at 7:13 AM on March 6, 2008 by Bob Collins (4 Comments)

Boy, here's a dilemma most parents will never have to face. A son lives a life dressed as a woman. So how should he be dressed upon his death?

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Comments (4)

I don't know that there is a "right" answer for this. It's hard to tell from the article whether Simmie identified him/herself as female to the extent that he used female prononuns to describe himself - or if he thought of himself as a gay male who sometimes dressed and appeared female. If he was identifying as fully female, it may the case that burying Simmie in a dress would have been truer to who he was. On the other hand, it is left to the living to make these decisions - and even the love of a truly understanding mother (which it seems that Simmie's mother was - she respected who her son was) may not overcome the desire for a last look at her son as she wanted to see him.

Posted by Anna Bliss | March 6, 2008 10:03 AM

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Close the lid & it don't matter if he's buck nekkid under there.

Posted by bsimon | March 6, 2008 10:06 AM

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Bob-
what are you trying to accomplish by this blog? I clicked on the link and first thing saw a picture of a woman grieving. Someone died.
What the hell man?!!!

Posted by c | March 6, 2008 10:11 AM

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Yes, quite a dilemma and one that I have come across twice in my job in mental health and which also has special meaning to me being transgendered myself (I am a crossdresser, i.e. a "part time" woman)

Both were young people in their 20's from country areas who moved to the city to transition and live as women. Sadly both suicided, one pre-operatively, the other post-operatively. Both were taken by their families back to their home towns (which had spurned them) and buried them as males.

Other transsexuals were horrified that this had happened and wanted to make sure that it never happened to them.

Posted by Christine | April 15, 2008 4:36 PM

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