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worst conversation starters ever..

Posted at 4:41 PM on March 28, 2007 by Mary Lucia (18 Comments)

No good can ever come from the following remarks..
1. "Would you be available to......"
2. "You probably don't remember but.."

Comments (18)

3. "I know this is going to sound creepy, but..."
4. "I'm really not a stalker..."
5. "The people at my job are so crazy they should make a TV show! Just the other day, Jed from receiving..."

Posted by Bill Childs | March 28, 2007 5:06 PM

"Don't take this the wrong way..."
"Oh, gross! Smell/taste this..."
"This morning I noticed this growth..."

Posted by nee | March 28, 2007 5:22 PM

Who can forget..
"I met someone last night who says they know you"

Posted by lucia | March 28, 2007 5:28 PM

"Hi (employee), this is (manager). Got five minutes to stop into my office?"

Posted by Steve Seel | March 28, 2007 5:30 PM

Does this make me look fat?

Posted by jimjim | March 28, 2007 5:45 PM


"Back when I was doing your job, I always..."

"Do you think it's inappropriate to..."

"We've serving hot dogs in honor of..."

Posted by Nikki | March 28, 2007 6:09 PM

When working in retail:
"Hi, I was in your store a little while ago, and..."

Posted by Mac Wilson | March 28, 2007 6:12 PM

"Hey, I just ate your cheese and..."
"Hi, I'm Brain Fellow! ..."

Posted by George H | March 29, 2007 1:37 AM

George H from UMM, is that you?

Posted by Mac Wilson | March 29, 2007 9:05 AM

Mary, I'm actually stealing this one from you, because it is so right on.
What you rarely want to hear when you answer the phone: "Where are you?"

Also, the time honored classic: "We need to talk."

Or pretty much any conversation that starts with "Listen..."

"Didn't I see you at...."
"You know who you remind me of?"
"Where do you work? Really? I have some opinions I'd like to share with you..."

Posted by Ali Lozoff | March 29, 2007 9:42 AM

"I'm behind you with a knife..."

"You know what's wrong with you?..."

"I'd really like to buy you a drink, but I have a bullet in my spine."

"Jesus, you smell like soup!"

Posted by Frick | March 29, 2007 12:20 PM

Anything having to do with my pants that isn't "I like your pants."

Posted by Jacquie Fuller | March 29, 2007 12:53 PM

"Can I tell you something?"

"I didn't want to bother you but..."

"Does this smell funny to you?"

"I hope this doesn't offend you..."

"You gonna eat that?"

Posted by Auntie | March 29, 2007 1:15 PM

You know I hardly ever do this...

Posted by Auntie | March 29, 2007 3:27 PM

To quote David Lee Roth (seriously)

"We need to have a band meeting."

Posted by Michael Wells | March 29, 2007 4:31 PM

"Don't worry, it's not loaded."

Posted by Frick | March 29, 2007 4:35 PM

"This won't hurt a bit"

Posted by Auntie | March 29, 2007 4:36 PM

"I like mittens"

Posted by Frick | March 29, 2007 4:41 PM

March 2007
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