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Why Kansas City should be wiped off the face of the earth

Posted at 12:18 PM on August 10, 2005 by Bob Collins

I've been watching baseball for about 45 years and I've seen some bad baseball, but seldom have I felt such sympathy for a Major League Baseball manager as I did last night for Buddy Bell; to the point where I wouldn't be offended to learn that the Royals' marketing department is working on a public execution night.

There is bad baseball (see Twins, Minnesota) and then there is embarrassing baseball. The former happens. The latter shouldn't; at least more than once.

The Royals last night entered the 9th inning with a 7-2 lead over the always-play-to-the-level-of-the-competition Cleveland Indians and their closer, Mike MacDougal. Now Mac isn't that good. But he's not that bad either.
No matter. The Royals are.

The 9th:

  • Former Twin Casey Blake doubles
  • Grady Sizemore doubles. 7-3
  • Coco Crisp singles. 7-4
  • Jhonny Peralta whiffs. One out.
  • Travis Hafner doubles. Crisp to third.
  • Victor Martinez hits bloop single. 7-5

    Now this message. Keep in mind here that the official scorer is a Kansas City boy. Keep in mind also that the Missouri Legislature did not pass a law preventing anyone from warming up when your closer is on the mound.

  • Ronnie Belliard pops out to shortstop Angel Berroa for the second out. Only Berroa, who should be tested for stupidity, drops the ball. A run scores to make it 7-6, but Berroa -- after subsequently kicking the ball -- gets the force at second. Two out.
  • Catcher can't hold on to Jeff Liefer's lame foul tip. Liefer gets second life but flies out easily to left field to end the game, only leftfielder Chip Ambres, using just one hand to show how cool he is, drops the ball. We're tied.
  • Aaron Boone, the Boone family member who can't hit but is still better than brother Bret, doubles. Indians lead 8-7.

    Get the picture? That's 5, actually 6 outs. But we're not done yet.

    Jimmy Gobble replaces MacDougal and the turkey gives up a walk, single (2 runs score), homer to Peralta (two runs score), and finally Travis Hafner flies out.

    The total damage. 11 runs. 11 RUNS on something like 6 hits. Four Kansas City errors in the game.

    And the Royals have now lost 11 in a row. And in 5 of them -- 5 of them -- they blew late-inning leads of at least 5 runs.

    So no matter how bad things are at the Metrodome, they're not Kansas City bad.

    Not yet anyway.

    After the game, Buddy Bell said, "to see a game like that is really unheard of. I'm sure it's happened before but I just haven't seen it. I hope I don't see it again, either."

    Not going to be at tonight's game, Buddy?

  • August 2005
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